Monday, February 10, 2014

The ED is a nutty place to be.

Ms. Demented: Doctor! Doctor! Doctor! Doctor! Doctor! Doctor! Doctor! Doctor! Doctor! Doctor!

(This went on for a while to a pretty regular beat that the nurses broke into song)

Med student: Hi, I need to take off your bandage.

Ms. Demented: No oh no doctor! Oh doctor! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! Oh doctor. Doctor! Doctor! What is your name?

Med student: Sam

Ms. Demented: Oh Sam! Oh doctor! Just like that! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! That's good! That's good! That's good! That's good! No! No! No! No! No! No!

(Sam leaves to get supplies)

Ms. Demented: Sam come back! Sam! Where is Sam! I only want Sam! Samuel! Samuel! Where are you? Come back! Doctor! Doctor! Doctor! Come back!

(Sam re-enters)

Ms. Demented: Samuel. I only want you Samuel. Oh Samuel. Oh doctor! Doctor! Doctor! Doctor! Doctor! Oh Samuel yes. I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you Samuel. I love you. Oh push me up Samuel! Oh jesus god push me up! Oh my god! Push me up! Oh Samuel! Oh doctor doctor doctor doctor doctor!!

3 comments:

  1. I think I had the same patient in the ER recently except she bit and kicked. She was extremely limber for her age.

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  2. Yeah I talked to the student after and he said that the whole time she was proclaiming her love for him she was kicking him in the chest!

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  3. I guess love hurts sometimes. ;-)

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